Entry: With Time Comes Maturity Monday, February 01, 2010

Through time, we are able to reflect and create on the things that we have done or will be doing. With that, I've come to a place of understanding, acceptance and maturity. I have light years to go in completing the perfect score but then again we are all human, we'll never get the perfect score. But! By accepting that we are who we are and accept the flaws we have, I think we're as perfect as we can get.

Everything starts from within. Self-acceptance is important especially when one is in a recovery mode. Then again, it is important in all aspects of life any way. If one can't accept oneself for what one is, how could anyone else do the same? Finally, after what felt like never, I have come to terms with that last year. It's been a long battle fighting against the currant and I failed floating, so when that option is painfully obvious it's a failure, I find other alternatives.

When I accepted everything the way it is, reminding myself daily about it like reciting mantras; I get to see the world in a different perspective. A lot more forgiving and loving as well as happier too. When I choose to be happy, I have to believe that I am happy in all sorts of ways. That's when self-happiness comes in. A place where you are happy on your own, for who you are and what you have become without depending on other people telling you so. And then self confidence kicks in. Slowly, everything falls into places and I started to feel good about myself.

Thinking back, many would probably go "It's pretty obvious isn't it? What took you so long?" and I think it's because some people have it easy and others may have to take a few detours before arriving to this conclusion. I suppose I'm the latter and glad it is the way it is because those rough patches I walked on were meant to shape my mind and soul to be better than that was laid in front of me. I was told that "Just because some people are like that, does not mean you have to be like them too. You're not them. You are a much better person" and at that time (before I had this eureka moment-the self realisation), I could not understand what he meant although I knew deep down he sincerely meant it.

A year had past, and today as I stand here, I am able to say those same words with confidence. When I fully comprehend the meaning of those words and accepted how the world works, I inadvertently become that :)


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